


Falling

by themrsbouvier



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Complete, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-29
Updated: 2014-01-29
Packaged: 2018-01-10 12:06:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,126
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1159552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/themrsbouvier/pseuds/themrsbouvier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Falling in love is a lot like falling off a 60 floor building. It hurts. A lot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Epiphany

It was just a normal day, or as normal a day as one could find it when being an international pop star and suddenly realizing you’re in love with your best friend. It’s just that people always talk about fireworks or some big dramatic rain storm or something and it was just a normal day, absolutely nothing interesting or unusual happened at all until that moment. He couldn’t figure out when exactly he had let it happen, not that he had much of a choice in the matter, maybe that’s why they called it ‘falling in love’. It happened gradually and so slowly that you didn’t even know it was happening until it smack you in the face. In Louis case he meant that literally. He was pulled out of his thought induced trace by Liam slapping him in the face, not hard enough to hurt or be considered mean but more like ‘hey we’re in an interview pay attention she asked you a question’. He pinched Liams’ side as his way of saying ‘thanks’ and maybe a little ‘sorry’ before plastering his trademark grin on his face and trying his best to pay attention to what the woman was saying. It wasn’t exactly working but that was par for the course with him.

He’d never been very good at staying still or keeping focused on one thing for too long. His sudden realization not helping his situation at all and silently resigned himself to being completely useless today. He leaned back on the couch as much as he could with 4 other people on it and crossed his arms, throwing Liam a pout. Liam just rolled his eyes before turning his attention back to the pretty blonde asking him questions and sweeping Louis legs over his so he could be more comfortable. Louis decided he didn’t like pretty blondes anymore and sent her glares that he hoped no one would comment on until his face softened when Liam pulled his legs onto is. It was a normal gesture that they’d all been accustomed to over the years. What else did they expect when they tried to stick 5 grown boys on a tiny couch? He never understood why they felt the need to do that but at the moment he was okay with it as long as it meant Liam was touching him.

He watched Liam when he didn’t think anyone was looking, he was relaxed and natural like he always was. It was like he thrived in these situations and maybe he did. Liam was a people person, polite and funny and charming. This was his environment; it was what he had always wanted to do and worked so hard for. It was one of the reasons none of the lads had an issue letting him take charge most of the time. That and they could never pay attention long enough to last the entire interview and they probably would just answer the questions in pig Latin or something. As if Liam could feel his stare he squeezed his thigh and Louis let his eyes flutter closed for a second. It relaxed his entire body and he almost felt like he could just fall asleep right now.

Thankfully the blonde was standing up and apparently the interview was over. Louis exhaled a breath he didn’t know he was holding as the other lads started squirming and fighting to stand up. Niall in a rush to probably grab some food ended up shoving Louis right into Liams lap. Louis froze for a second before realizing it was a normal occurrence and he was being stupid and faking a dramatic cry. Liam just laughed and wrapped his arms around the smaller boy and pulling him close

“It’s okay Louis, I’ll keep you safe,” he whispered in Louis ear.

Louis sighed and buried his face in Liams chest, fighting back the chills he got when Liams breath blew hot against his skin. Yeah being in love with your best friend was hard. Once the lads had all climbed off the couch and started filing out of the room Liam let his arms loosen from around Louis and pulled back to look at him. It took a few seconds for Louis to realize he was waiting for him to get up and finally got up and held his hand out to help Liam up.

“Told you I’d protect you,” Liam smiled before reaching out and ruffling Louis hair.

He was out the door before Louis could even manage an indignant hmpf. He ran his hands over his hair trying his best to fix the damage as he made his way out after the other boys. He climbed into the backseat of the van, forced to sit in the back with A sleepy Zayn and a grumpy Niall who moaned the entire time that he was going to die if he didn’t get some food soon. Liam was sitting in front of him next to Harry and Louis took that as an opportunity to get his revenge. He leaned over the seat and bit down on Liams neck hard enough that he knew there was going to be a mark. Harry laughed while Liam slapped a hand over the sore spot and turned to look at Louis with shock and the hint of a small smile.

They got back to the hotel and piled out of the van. Louis was first after having shoved Liam out of the way and back onto Harry. He ran into the hotel and pushed the button to call the lift. Liam caught up with him and poked him hard in the side. Louis laughed as the lift doors open and he shoved Liam inside, leaving the rest of the boys to get their own. The entire ride to their floor was basically an excuse to have a poke war and even when an elderly woman got in and gave them both disapproving looks they refused to stop. As they finally reached their floor and got out of the lift, Liam saying a polite goodnight to the woman, his cell started ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket and clicked answer without even looking at it.

“Hello,” He breathed in between laughs.

He froze when he heard Eleanor on the other end. This was going to complicate things for sure. He’d forgotten about her in all his confusion and the whole epiphany thing. He looked back at Liam who just waved him a good night before going into his room and leaving Louis alone in the hallway. It took him a few seconds to realize she was still talking and he unlocked his own door.

“That’s great El, but um..we have to talk about something.”


	2. Starting the fall

Liam closed the door to his hotel room and leaned back against it. He was out of breath but he was blaming that on the fact that he’d just spent the last five minutes running and having a poke war with Louis. The fact that his heart may have skipped a beat at the thought of the other boys name was just normal. What else would it be? He pushed himself off the door and pulled off his jacket, hanging it on the back of the chair before kicking off his shoes. He walked over to his bed and flopped down. He was bored now and had way too much energy to sleep. Usually this would be the point when he’d go and bug Louis but clearly that wasn’t an option tonight. He furrowed his brow and shook his head deciding to just ignore how bitter that sounded even if it was just in his head.

He didn’t know what was going on in his head. Suddenly he was feeling..not angry but..jealous of El? That didn’t make any sense. Why would he be jealous of Eleanor? She may Louis girlfriend but it’s not like she was stealing Louis away. He saw Louis more than she did at this point. Besides he had Dani, who he hadn’t actually spoken to in a while. He grabbed his phone with every intention of finally returning her four missed calls but got distracted by his new lock screen. He didn’t know when Louis had managed to snag his phone and change it to a picture of them. He smiled down at his phone forgetting all about Dani. He set it back down on the table after a few minutes and thought back to when the picture was taken.

They were in the limo on their way to the Brits and Liam was fidgeting nervously. The Brits were the most important award ceremony to him. It was basically the music equivalent of the Oscars and he always stressed himself out beforehand. The other lads were laughing and screwing around and he didn’t understand why they weren’t taking this seriously. Then there was a hand in his squeezing and without even looking he knew it was Louis. His body relaxed instantly and he finally stopped hyper ventilating. He turned to look at Louis and saw him smiling reassuringly at him before leaning in to whisper in his ear.

“You look great, stop worrying so much,” Louis kissed his cheek before pulling back and returning to the other conversation. Liams heart rate sped up again when he noticed Louis was still holding his hand.

He was brought back to reality by a loud noise outside his room and jumped up on his bed, throwing a glance at the door. He debated for a few seconds if he should go and see what it was but after hearing Pauls voice he decided he could just stay where he was. His mind drifting back to his thoughts and..froze when he realized something. That feeling he got when Louis touched him, the feeling he had earlier, the feeling he got in the hallway..he was jealous. He wasn’t jealous because he thought El was stealing friend time he was jealous because he was in love with Louis. His heart sped up and he was hyper ventilating again. He was not in love with Louis, he had Dani and he loved her. This was just..it wasn’t happening. He reached over towards the table and grabbed his phone calling Dani. He was not going to let this happen. It was going to pass, it was just a side effect of not having seen Dani in a while. Tranferrance. He was transferring his feelings for Dani onto Louis. That’s all. He walked out onto the balcony as the phone rang and spotted Louis standing on the next one. Hanging up the phone without even thinking about it he hopped over the gates to Louis.

It only took one look at his best friend to see he’d been crying. He pulled him into his arms and frowned.

“Louis? What happened? Are you okay?” He asked concerned and confused for his best friend.

Louis just shook his head and held tighter to Liam.


	3. Oh no she didn't

Louis walked into his room and sat down on the edge of the bed and took a deep breath. El was talking a mile a minute and he wasn’t sure she had heard anything he’d said so far. She was going on about some new modeling job she got and normally that would have caught his interest but now it was just a bit more annoying than anything else. He sighed loudly hoping she would understand that was meant to be a sign for her to stop talking and thankfully it worked.

“Everything okay, Lou?” She asked not really sounding all that interested at all.

“We have to talk El. I wish it didn’t have to happen this way but I can’t wait anymore either. I don’t want to keep leading you on when this just isn’t working anymore. I..care about you a lot, you know that and I always will but I’m in love with someone else. I don’t know when it happened but it did and it’s not fair to anyone for me to stay with you when my feelings have changed,” He took a breath having just blurted that all out so quick he hoped she understood.

El was silent and he was a little afraid she hung up before he heard a quiet sob from the other side of the phone and felt the guilt growing in his stomach. “You’re..you’re in love with someone else?” As she talked he could hear when her voice turned from sad and upset to angry. “When did you even have time to find someone else. You’re so busy you hardly have any time to even pick up the phone when I call,” She yelled, or at least as much as she could yell given her usually quiet demeanor.

Louis sighed and ran his free hand over his face and through his hair. “I..” His voice got really quiet and was sure she wouldn’t be able to hear his next words. “It’s Liam. I’m in love with Liam.”

He heard El laugh on the other end of the line and furrowed his brows as if she could see the confusion on his face. “I’m sorry; did you just say that you’re in love with Liam? Like your best friend, the very straight, dating Dani, Liam Payne? This is a joke right? Like you guys got together and decided it would make a better April fool’s joke if it wasn’t actually on April fools or something. You’re not even gay Louis and if you were come on you know everyones first guess would be with Harry. This isn’t even a well thought out joke now is it?”

Louis could feel himself getting more annoyed by this conversation at this point. “It’s not a joke El, and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t laugh at me. Liam doesn’t know about this. Hell I only figured it out today. Actually more like an hour ago. I’m not an idiot though, I know he probably doesn’t feel the same and I can deal with that. It’ll be hard but I can but it wouldn’t be fair to you or myself if I kept this thing with you going if I wasn’t completely invested in it anymore,” he sighed feeling completely defeated at this point.

“You’re breaking up with me because you’ve decided you’re gay for your best friend. What am I supposed to do with this information, Louis? Not exactly how a girl enjoys being broken up with and don’t make a joke about girls not liking being broken up at all. I’m mad at you. What do you think is going to happen Louis? Do you think no one is going to find out and you can just keep this your dirty little secret forever? You can’t, wait till I tell Dani,” She laughed before hanging up the phone without even a goodbye.

Louis froze as he listened to the dial tone on the phone for a few minutes before finally hanging up. He hadn’t realized he’d started crying being more distracted by the fact that he was having trouble breathing. He hadn’t expected her to react that way. He knew she was going to be mad and upset but he hadn’t expected her to go and run off to tell one of the last people he wanted to know. He headed out onto his balcony hoping that the fresh air would help him catch his breath. He gripped the railing and took deep breaths until he heard Liam next to him. He didn’t even know how he hadn’t gotten over here and he didn’t want to focus on that right. Instead he just leaned into Liams chest and cried.


	4. It doesn't count if he's sleeping

Liam held him close and let him cry for a while before pulling back a little.

“Louis, let’s go inside and we can talk about whatever it is. Is Eleanor okay?” He blushed and stuttered a little as he tried to push down his anger at the thought that El had been the one to put Louis in his current state. “I just..I heard you on the phone in the hallway..” 

Louis looked up at him and blinked back his tears. He couldn’t tell Liam the truth, at least not all of it. It’s not like he actually believed that Eleanor was going to out him. Sure she was mad but she wasn’t cruel. He nodded and led Liam inside and sat down on the edge of the bed. He should probably just ask Liam to leave, give him some excuse about needing time on his own but he didn’t want to and maybe that was selfish. If he told Liam to leave he would know something was up and start asking questions Louis wasn’t ready to handle.

“El and I broke up. It just wasn’t working anymore. We were always apart and we’d been drifting. She didn’t feel the same I guess and she said some things. It’s fine I’m over reacting. Probably just over tired or something. I didn’t mean to wake you up, you should head back to bed. I didn’t mean to keep you up, sorry.”

Liam rolled his eyes and went about the room cleaning it up as Louis talked. He needed to keep himself busy so that Louis wouldn’t notice the conflicting feelings he was feelings. He was relieved that El wasn’t in the picture anymore but at the same time Louis was clearly upset and that didn’t sit well with him. He went into the little kitchen and started making Louis some tea.

“You’re not keeping me up or from anything. I want to be here. Honestly I would have been here earlier but I knew you were on the phone. Didn’t want to interrupt anything. I’m not that sleepy anyway. I think I’m still on a bit of a performance high. You need me right now more anyway. We’ll have some tea and watch the Avengers.”

He poured Louis a cup and walked over to the bed and sat next to him. He moved back against the headboard and pulled Louis with him, the cup of tea ending up on the bedside table. His early discovery no longer mattered and he pushed it aside and decided to just focus on being his best friend. He hadn’t really even decided what to do with his new found information anyway. Louis laid his head on Liams chest and Liam wrapped an arm around him. He could feel Louis breathing even out. He was glad that he had been able to help his friend somehow even if he couldn’t make his pain go away. He ran his fingers through his hair and took a deep breath.

“It’s going to be okay Lou. It’s gonna take time but like you said you just didn’t feel the same anymore. You’ll move on and when you’re ready you can have your pick of girls. Any girl would be lucky to have you and until then you have me. I can distract you and make you laugh and do all that crazy stuff that you love doing so much. You did that for me after Dani and I broke up and now it’s my turn,” He smiled.

Louis had fallen asleep sometime during that speech and Liam smiled down at him and sighed. “I love you Louis.”


	5. The ugly green monster

Things progressed in much the same way over the next week. They’d go on stage and Liam would do his best to keep Louis happy and laughing and then they’d go back to the hotel and at some point one of them would sneak into the others room and they’d fall asleep like that. Liam never brought up El again and Louis never asked him about Dani. Not that there was much to tell about her, he’d never called her back after that night and he’d never called her back at all. She’d tried calling him a bunch of times but he’d been preoccupied with Louis that he’d forgotten.

They were walking back into the hotel laughing and joking after a show when Liam froze. Standing in the middle of the lobby was Dani. He knew he should be happy to see her, he should probably be running into her arms or something but he just turned and looked at Louis. Trying to read his face and find out if this was going to be a problem. Louis could read him like a book and just gave him a small smile and grabbed his shoulder before walking away and leaving him standing there with Dani alone. Liam took a step towards her tentatively and she grinned at him before meeting him the rest of the way.

“Hey, you haven’t been returning my calls so I figured this was the only way to talk to you,” she smiled as she pulled him in for a hug.

Liam frowned and looked at the ground, “Yeah, sorry just been a bit busy.”

Dani nodded and kissed him, “Yeah El told me about her and Louis. How is he?”

Liam sighed and shrugged before moving away from her and heading up to his room. “He’s alright I guess. He hasn’t been sleeping that well.”

Dani laughed and rolled her eyes, “I’m sure you’ve been helping him with that.”

Liam turned to look at her a mix of confusion and anger that he was trying to control, “What is that supposed to mean?”

Dani sighed and walked to Liam’s door and glanced down the hall towards Louis door, “Really Liam? You mean you haven’t figured it out yet? Hasn’t he told you anything about why El and he broke up? He’s in love with you. He’s deluded himself into thinking he even has a chance with you.”

Dani walked over to where Liam had frozen in the hallway and grabbed him by the shirt and maneuvering him so that he was backed against Louis door. Liam tried to push her away but she was intent on doing whatever it was she was doing.

“You’re not his Liam. You’re mine and he needs to understand that. He needs to understand that you’re never going to want to be with him. You can’t just keep letting him get his hopes up, it’s only going to hurt him more,” She whispered.

Liam was angry now and he wasn’t going to play nice, he pushed her off of him and glared at her. He couldn’t remember ever being this angry before. “Don’t. Don’t talk about him like that. You don’t know what you’re talking about Dani so just shut up. You should leave because I don’t want you here. You’d think me not returning your calls would be enough for you to get the hint but I guess not. We’re over. So just..leave.”

Dani stared at him before grabbing her bag and walking away. Liam sunk to the floor and buried his face in his hands. He felt the door open and knew it was Louis. He didn’t know what to say to him and Louis seemed to understand that. He just held out his hand and helped him to his feet. He just led him to bed and didn’t say a word until he knew Liam was asleep and he finally let himself cry.


	6. Rock Bottom

Liam woke up in the middle of night and found himself wrapped in Louis arms. He knew he should leave but instead he found himself staring at his best friend. Things were going to be different now and he didn’t know how he felt about that. He just felt confused about everything lately and knowing that Louis had apparently heard the whole thing only made him feel worse. He stared at the tear streaks on Louis face and reached out to softly wipe them away. He knew Louis must have cried himself to sleep and that didn’t help Liam feel any better about anything. He laid there for a few minutes just staring at him and running his fingers through his hair and down his face. He must have laid there for a good ten minutes before leaning in and placing a soft kiss to Louis lips. He closed his eyes and just let the whole thing hit him. He was just relieved that they were going to have a break and he could spend a week not having to deal with any of this. He slipped out of the bed and gathered his things before heading out the door. He stopped once to look back at Louis before shaking his head and heading back to his room.

Liam packed his things as fast as he could and sent a text to Paul letting him know that he was going home early. He called a cab and headed back to his flat. He didn’t stay long; he knew it was the first place anyone would look for him. He couldn’t go to his parents either, he knew the guys were going to be worried especially if they heard about the break up but he just needed some time to himself. He swapped his clothes out for some clean ones and grabbed his car keys planning on just driving until he couldn’t anymore. He passed a picture of him and Louis on his way out and paused for just a minute before turning and leaving slamming the door behind him. The picture falls off the shelf and crashes to the floor shattering.

The sun was shining through Louis hotel room window and into his face. He tried to bury himself further into the bed and stretched out before jumping up with a start. The events of last night starting to come back to him he frowned when he saw Liams spot on the bed empty. He sighed and sat down running his hands over his face. Everything was such a disaster and he didn’t know how to fix it. Everything that Dani said last night, Liams reaction to it all, he had every reason to run right now. But he was selfish and he didn’t want to let Liam go that easily. He left his room and went next door to Liams and Banged on the door.

 

“Liam, I know you’re in there open the door.”

 

He was yelling and banging for at least five minutes before a very tired looking Paul came out and stopped him.

 

“He’s not in there Louis. He went home,” He sighed and shook his head before going back into his room.

 

It took three days before Liam got tired of running and returned home. He didn’t know why he was surprised by what he found when he got there. He walked in his door and tossed and his bags down, before heading to his room to finally get a good night’s sleep in his own bed. Instead he found Louis curled up with his face in his pillow and burrowed in his blankets. Liam sighed and went to close the door but was stopped by Louis voice.

 

“Don’t. Don’t run away again,” His voice was hoarse from sleep and yet he still managed to sound angry and demanding at the same time.

 

Liam froze and turned back to face him, he looked tired and worn out and Liam just wanted to reach out and hold him. He wanted to take away all of his pain but then he remembered that he was most likely the cause of it. Louis got out of the bed and walked over towards Liam. Liam couldn’t read his face and that made him nervous. But the punch that landed on his left cheek cleared things up for him. He watched as Louis went to hit him again and grabbed his arm to stop him.

 

“You left me. Without a fucking word Liam. After everything how could you just leave like that? You didn’t even think about the rest of us did you? About me,” His voice got quiet towards the end and he yanked his hand away from Liam. “You’re a jackass.”

 

Liam didn’t say anything; he just nodded and looked defeated. He knew he shouldn’t have just left like that. Not without saying anything to Louis.

 

“I’m sorry. I just..I needed some time. I needed to clear my head and being around you wasn’t going to help me figure anything out,” He sighed.

 

Louis stood there and shook his head, he was tired of doing this dance and it was going to end. “Everything Dani said that night was the truth. I broke up with El because I’m in love with you. I don’t even know when it happened and it doesn’t matter. I never expected anything from you, especially for you to return my feelings but I expected that if the day ever came that you found out you’d at least handle it better then you did. I thought we were friends Liam, but you find out my biggest secret and you ran from me. That hurt and I’m done letting you hurt me. So from now on just think of me as a co worker because we sure as hell aren’t friends.”

 

Liam opened and closed his mouth to say something but couldn’t get any words to come out. Louis just shook his head and turned, leaving the apartment, slamming the door on his way. Liam fell down onto his bed and cried.


	7. Worth it in the end

Three days. It seemed to be the pattern taking shape in his life. It always took three days before he could force himself to do anything productive. Or anything at all that wasn’t cowardly. It took three days for Liam to come to his senses and do the right thing, even if it took him some help to get there. Three days had passed since Louis had stormed out of his apartment and apparently his life. He hadn’t tried texting him, nor calling him. He knew Louis had meant everything he’d said and he didn’t blame him for any of it. He owed it to Louis to do this for him. Maybe he really was better off without him in his life. All he ever seemed to do was mess things up and hurt him.

He groaned and rolled over as the sun started peeking into the bedroom through his curtains. His face was past the point of stubble now and bordering full on cave man. If he’d had the motivation to get up and look in a mirror he’d probably be horrified and confused by the image he would be faced with. He hadn’t left his house since that day, surviving mostly on leftovers not yet gone bad and whatever crisps and beer he had left in the house from god knows when. He reached down to pull the covers over his head and retreat back into his cave when there was a banging coming from his front door. He groaned and pulled his pillow over his head. He didn’t want to see anyone and he hadn’t told anyone he was home besides Paul so he was determined to ignore whoever it was until they went away.

After a few minutes the pounding stopped and Liam finally let out a breath of relief and settled himself back into bed. His relief only lasted a few seconds though before a furious looking Harry Styles was ripping the safety of his comforter away from him. He flipped onto his back and propped himself up on his elbows to look at his curly haired friend. “What do you want Hazza?”

Harry glared at him with his arms crossed over his chest. “Don’t call me Hazza. Only Liam calls me Hazza and you are not Liam. I don’t know who you are or what you’re on but you better fix your shit quick Payne before I have to kick to your ass. You know I could..or I could hire someone to do it anyway. I bet I could convince Paul to do it. Especially if he saw the state you’re in. You almost look worse than Lou and that’s saying something.”

Liam had the decency to flinch when Harry mentioned Louis but didn’t say anything. He just fell back into his bed and rolled his eyes. “Go away Harry. I’m on vacation. Don’t you have something better you could be doing then annoying me?” He knew he was being rude and Harry didn’t deserve it but he figured he might as well play the role he’d chosen for himself. He’d gone from Daddy Direction to the Jackass.

Harry sighed and walked out of the room, Liam thought he was leaving and let himself relax again. As he reached down to grab his comforter off the floor he was met with a face full of water. “Wake up Payne. You can be as much of an ass as you want. You can try to push me away but I know you. I might not be Zayn and we might not be as close or whatever but I know. I know you’re in love with Louis and you’re being a right twat because you’re afraid of mucking it up. But you’ve already gone and done that haven’t you, so how’s about getting your head out of your ass and fixing it? Louis has been a right mess. He’s just moping around my place like he’s just had half of his heart removed or something. He’s talking about quitting the band and I will not let that happen Liam Payne. We are a band the five of us and you’re both my best mates and you belong together. Everyone can see it so stop being such a cock about it. You got scared and you ran. I get it and so does Lou but you didn’t even fight for him. He’s Louis, he likes a big dramatic climax.” Harry smirked trying to get some sort of reaction from the expressionless Liam. “He wants to know that you love him. That you mean it and that you’re willing to fight for him because it’s not going to be easy. He wants to know it’s gonna be worth it in the end. That you’re worth it.”

Liam sighed but actually sits up on his bed and runs a hand over his face. It gave Harry a false sense of progress which was immediately taken away. “He deserves better than me. I would fight for him if I thought it was the best thing for him Harry, you know I would. I’d do anything for him even before..but this is different. It we did this..it would change everything. All the rumors he tried so hard to beat down, all the names people call him..I don’t want to hurt him. He’s my best mate and I don’t want to lose him but if I let him think that us would be a good idea then I’d have to live with that everyday. Live with the guilt knowing that if I had just been a little less selfish he could have gone off and married El and had babies like he wants.”

Harry groaned and took a seat on the bed. “You’re the dumbest person I’ve ever met Liam Payne. Louis left El because he wants you. Everything you just mentioned he wants with you and only you. You think you’re being selfless or some giant bloody hero by giving up the guy you love to what? Save him? Louis doesn’t need you to save him. He’s a grown up Liam and he can make his own choices. You don’t need to protect us anymore. It’s okay to be selfish and get something you want. Louis know what will happen and he doesn’t care. He was ready to face all of that because of you. And you won’t be going it alone either. Me and the lads will always have your backs and you should know that Payne.”

Liam sat on the bed, still taking in everything Harry is saying. For the first time in what feels like ages he finally feels like things are making sense. He’d been such an idiot, he hadn’t meant to be but he had and now it was time to fix it. He reached a hand out to pat Harry on the shoulder. “Thanks Mate. I guess I needed someone to put me in my place. I’m really sorry for everything. Is Lou..?”

Harry smiled and nodded, “It’s what mates are for, yeah? He’s at my place. But you might want to shave and shower first because you’re right ripe mate.” He shoved Liam playfully before heading over to his closet and going through his clothes. “Go, I’ll try to find something decent for you to wear.”

Liam walked into his bathroom and locked the door behind him. He walked over to his sink and looked into the mirror for the first time in days. Harry was right; he didn’t recognize the person in front of him. He opened the cabinet and pulled out his shaving cream and razor and went to work repairing the damage one step at a time. After shaving and showering he walked back into his room to see Harry finishing laying out an outfit on the bed. “Is this better?”

Harry looked up at the sound of Liam’s voice and smiled. “Nice to have you back Li. We missed you.” He walked over and hugged his friend even if he was wet and half naked. “I’m trusting you Liam. Fix this and no shagging in my apartment.” He pat him on the back before leaving him to finish getting ready. He’d done all he could do for his two friends.

Liam had never gotten ready so fast outside of a show in his life. But now that he knew what he was going to do, now that he had a plan he felt like he wouldn’t be able to breathe until he’d fixed things with Louis. He got in his car and drove to Harry’s as fast as he could manage without getting pulled over. When he pulled up he’d barely turned the car off before he was out the door and running up Harry’s front steps. He pulled out his key ring and found Harry’s key that he had there for safe keeping and walked into the apartment slowly. It was dark and he was a little worried that Louis might just punch him in the face again. His bruise had only just healed from the last time. He made his way through the apartment until he saw the flickering light of Harry’s living room TV and heard the unmistakable sobs and yells from Louis. Lism sighed as he made his way into the living room and noticed what had upset Louis so much. “Louis you know you shouldn’t watch A Walk to Remember. It always makes you angry.”

Louis jumped at the sound of Liams voice and fell off the couch in the process. Liam laughed before hurrying around to help him up but Louis moved out of his reach. “What are you doing here? I told you I didn’t want to see you. We’re not friends anymore Liam. Go home.”

A flash of hurt showed on Liams face as he steered himself for whatever was going to happen next. “I deserve that. Everything you said about me was right that. I was a coward. I was a horrible friend to you and you didn’t deserve that. You told me your deepest secret and I.. I betrayed you. I’m not asking for you to forgive because I’m not really sure I deserve it, honestly. But the truth is Louis, I love you. I am crazy, stupid in love with you and it scares me. I’ve never loved anyone like this before and it’s not something that’s easy to handle. I thought by pretending and pushing you away that I was protecting you. That I was shielding you from all the crap that would be thrown at us but I know now that I was wrong. I was being selfish and the only person I was protecting was myself. I was protecting myself because I was so terrified of letting you down that I thought it would be better to just not try at all then to try and fail. But I was wrong. I love you Louis Tomlinson and that’s worth fighting for. Doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks or what people say about it because it doesn’t change the facts or my feelings. What we have is worth fighting for and you may not be ready to forgive me now, you may not forgive me tomorrow but one day you will because you’re it for me Louis.”

Louis just stared up at him as he spoke unable to say anything. He had to reach down and pinch himself just to make sure that he hadn’t fallen asleep and this whole thing wasn’t just a dream. He was having a hard time believing that Liam was actually here and saying everything that he had always wanted to hear. He pushed himself off the ground so that he was standing and faced Liam. Hesitantly he reached out and laid a hand on his chest. “Just checking to see if you’re real. This better not be some sort of prank Payno or I swear I will castrate you in your sleep.”

Liam laughed and placed his hand over Louis, “It’s not a prank and I’m real. I promise. I love you Louis and if you’re willing to forgive me then I’m all in. I am all in and I don’t plan on ever folding. You’re bet?”

Louis bit his lip and studied Liam’s face looking for any sort of sign that this was a joke but he couldn’t find any. He was really here and he’d really said all of that and Louis couldn’t find it in himself to be mad anymore. “Come here you bloody fool.” Louis smiled as he pulled Liam in for the kiss they had both been dreaming about for way too long.

As everything finally fell into place for Liam he couldn’t help but think he finally understood what they meant by Falling in love. It sometimes took you a long time to get there and when you finally stopped falling and you reached the inevitable result it hurt like a bitch and there was hardly any chance that you were going to come out of it alive but when it was right, when it’s with the right person you don’t have to fall alone and then it’s maybe not such a scary thing afterall.


End file.
